I am a {WoNdErFuL} mother

I am a wonderful mother. There are women who become mothers without effort, without thought, without patience or loss; and although they are good mothers and love their children, I know that I will be better. I will be better not because of genetics or money or because I have read more books, but because I have struggled and toiled for this child. I have longed and waited. I have cried and prayed. I have endured and planned over and over again. Like most things in life, the people who truly have appreciation are those who have struggled to attain their dreams. I will notice everything about my child. I will take time to watch my child sleep, explore, and discover. I will marvel at this miracle everyday for the rest of my life. I will be happy when I wake in the middle of the night to the sound of my child, knowing I can comfort, hold, and feed him and that I am not waking to take another temp, pop another pill, take another shot, or cry tears of a broken dream. My dream will be crying for me. I count myself lucky in this sense; that God has given me this insight, this special vision with which I will look upon my child. Whether I parent a child I actually give birth to; or a child that God leads to me; I will not be careless with my love. I will be a better mother for all I have endured. I am a better woman, a better sister, a better daugher, neighbor, and friend because I have known pain. I know disillusionment, as I have been betrayed by my own body. I have been tried by both fire and hell, that many never face, yet given time, I stood tall. I have prevailed. I have succeeded. I have won. So now, when others hurt around me, I do not run from their pain in order to save myself discomfort. I see it, mourn it, and join them in theirs. And even though I cannot make it better, I can make it less lonely. I have learned the immense power of having another hand in mine, of other eyes that moisten as they learn to accept the harsh truth when life is beyond hard. I have learned a compassion that only comes by walking in those shoes. I have learned to further appreciate life. Yes, I am a wonderful mother.