Monday, December 12, 2011

::: compiling more and more words :::

She is awoken in the night by the sound of a truck rushing through the street that passes by their house. She rolls out of bed, peers out the frosted window as she wraps the robe and ties it at the waist, covering her silk and lace nightgown that shows just enough to get imaginations to run wild. His imagination is currently nonexistent and he barely noticed her in bed next to him, let alone what she slipped on earlier begging for his attention.

She ever so quietly takes steps towards the doorway, tiptoeing and breathing gently as to not awake anyone else. She takes the steps downstairs, feeling each individual step under her cold feet. The house is dark, cold, and with no one else awake it appears empty.

The coffee pot screeches for a brief second before she pours the boiling water into her cup, being instantly absorbed by the camomile and turning the water a light shade as it dissolves and becomes one. She wraps her hands around the cup feeling the warmth. She leans in and takes a smell, breathing deeply this time. It's the smell of relaxation and she enjoys this thoroughly.

She takes a seat in her favorite room at the front of the house, peering out the large window that faces the street. She is watching cars periodically pass by and wondering where any of them might be going at this time of night. She begins painting pictures in her mind. Are some of them venturing to work? A security guard for a museum, having to go in early, turn on all the lights, make sure everything is in running order for the visitors soon coming? Perhaps some of them are coming from a late night cuddled up on the couch with their lover. The movie they watched ended hours ago but the conversation and holding one another, not wanting to leave lasted far more than any romance they've ever watched. Laughing in the late night, under the moon, holding tightly to one another, whispering sweet words for each other to hear, kissing until the last possible moment before having to head home to prepare for work only a couple hours later.

She closes her eyes briefly and images begin playing in her head like a slideshow cast upon a projection screen. She is enthralled in remembering how her relationship began with him. Always romantic, always with late nights full of "don't leave" and "just stay" knowing that it would only be a few hours until they were together again but also knowing every second without him felt like an eternity.

In the very beginning, they scrambled and juggled to find the time to spend together, and there never seemed to be enough time in any given day. He would leave around four in the morning. They would spend hours rolled up in bed, fooling around to countless minutes never minded, not being able to ever fully satisfy the addiction of each other and the feeling of being skin on skin. He would always leave her and it was a bittersweet moment looking back now. He was obsessed with being with her and she with being with him. They knew that moment of leaving each others side at all wouldn't be possible to last long. They had to be together. It was the drug that kept them alive.

Just as soon as she heard the door close behind him, she'd roll over to tightly grab hold of the pillow next to her that smelled of him. Her phone almost instantaneously ringing on the nightstand next to the bed where she lay barely clothed and feeling saddened at the thought of once again being left to sleep alone. Of course it was him calling. It was her duty to whisper sweet nothings into the receiver so the man on the other end of the line wouldn't fall asleep on his long drive home.

A few short hours of sleep for them both and they would awaken with springs in their steps and flutters in their stride knowing there would be phone calls to answer and secret coffee rendezvous' to arrange just as soon as the sun began to rise. Being tired, rundown, extremely exhausted didn't exist in their world. They counted down seconds while apart until they could be together again. She would happily dance about knowing that they were to be together soon, either enjoying breakfast before heading to the office or escaping the concrete jungles mid-day to get lost in the streets of the city while finding low key place to dive into or duck into dark alleyways to kiss and laugh as time passed.

They would pass each other going opposite directions on the highway each morning. It was a great start to what always seemed to be an amazing day. Both were heading to work, both heading to live a life they pretended day in and day out full of mediocrity. There were fake smiles to friends, small talk and chatter with co-workers, both just watching the minutes dwindle down on their wristwatches, counting down the seconds until it was their time. They'd talk on the phone while driving to work, honk and wave in passing, laughing about how silly they must look to someone that couldn't understand this love. And by someone, it meant everyone. No one could possibly understand this love.

Sometimes just a sweet dessert; rich, decadent and full of romance; just like him and she ate up like the creme brulee he would feed to her from a vintage spoon. There was love behind his eyes and complete infatuation of her in his heart. She felt it burn through her like her body had been lit on fire. Her cheeks burning, her heart melting, her soul completely vulnerable for the man that showed her how to live her life, with love.

She smiled behind her cup of hot tea. As much as she knew they were in a very dark place currently, taking time all alone to sit and reminisce about the period of time of falling in love with each other reminded her of all the many milestones they had to overcome to get into position they were in now, together. She began to feel cozy in her robe and confident in her heart knowing that his down slope would too pass, like so many prior.

They were warriors in that time. Everyone against their relationship, not to mention the odds. They banded together, shields and swords in hand, fighting off any feat that came in their path. Hurting people and burning bridges along the way. They walked the world together, nobody ever siding with them nor agreeing that all the sacrifices and hurdles they had to overcome to be together was worth it in any way. They were tossed an enchanting fairy tale in their "going through the motions" lives and they hurt others to find happiness for themselves which was beyond selfish however, battles were fought within themselves too, and nobody took the time to realize.

In was starting to snow and she could see the flakes falling fast from the orange glow that was beginning to rise in the sky. This was the time of year that always reminded her of when things really took off. Scarves being thrown around one another while meandering down the snowy streets. The cold, winter weather didn't matter. It was always warm in the beds as well as their hearts, just how they liked it.

She set her coffee cup on the counter before climbing the stairs and crawling back into bed to cuddle with the man next to her, hoping she'd find the man she fell in love with deep down under the sheets somewhere.

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